Again HIS help showered me with gladness, alhamdulillah. Demi Allah, I didnt ask HIM, I did not. I just thought of it. A good intention for my oldest son… I really really wanted to give him something that would make him happy. That’s it but I did not know how. That thought came to my mind over and over again and I still did not know the way out. I did not have any way out, I stucked.

And HE answered me. Subhanaa Allah. Alhamdulillah. I did not ask HIM.. but HE knows what was in my heart and HE knows how hard I fight my nafs to be closer to HIM to be HIS dear :). Tawakal… I am sure it is the key. It is so clear that HE knew my sadness because, the “way out” was narated like this : ” Give this to your oldest son, this is especially for him”. Subhanaa Allah….. I never told anybody about my intention to make my oldest son happy, never. I just kept the willingness  in my heart. And HE answered me so quickly and the “amount” of HIS gift was biger than what I wanted!….. oh Allah… thank you so much.

I read some signs that, I am pretty sure, are the answers of my confussion. HIS light is brighter than a sun, I can find it everywhere. Sometimes it is very soft light…. but in the dark, we can see even a weakest light, isnt it? Just like a pale moon light… soft yet so warm.

Allah… I know YOU are so near….